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Archive for January, 2008

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Ovid had three suits,
of blue and black and green.
They were as drab as
any suits you have ever seen.

He’d wear them in and wear them out.
No one seemed to mind
They thought he was a funeral director,
Just mournful all the time

One day he found some tennis balls,
all bright and fuzzy yellow.
He made himself a brand new suit.
Now he’s a happy fellow

He wears his suit all the day
from sun to shining sun
And when he’s not eating,
he’s just having fun!

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New Joke Day.

I’m still working on this one so bear with me.

Four guys walk into an bar: a mormon, a black guy, a feminist broad and a guy who lived in a cage for 5 years… 

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A new addition.

tele-1.jpg tele-2.jpg

I bought a Fender Telecaster over the weekend on eBay.  I’m so fired up to get it and the seller tells me it will be delivered to my work on Friday (tomorrow)!  Awesome.

For you git-heads, it’s not anything super collectable or rare, just a Fender Telecaster Custom ’62 reissue.  This is basically a replica of the double-bound pre-CBS Tele with a Bigsby.  The finish is a nice three-tone sunburst.  I like the rosewood fretboard and yellowed (faux aged) finish on the neck.  And dang if a double-bound Tele isn’t the best looking Tele of all time.  These Japanese-made Tele are really well made and have a nice vibe.  They are light but very solid and tight.

Why did I buy this guitar?  Well, it’s going to be a little customization project for me. 

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Lost. A Little Light Recap.

Lost returns tonight. Normally, I wouldn’t care as much but the dearth of television vying for my eyebobbles has forced me into a slump. Or at least muddied the waters of what I do and do not care about.

No. The real truth is more along the lines of…I was extremely bored throughout last season and then they gave a finale that screwed with my head. No doubt I was getting a little bored with your flashbacks. But giving me flash forwards? Oh, Lost, you silly impish prankster!

If you’re like me, you can’t remember what the heck happened last season. And that is where I can lend a helping hand.

Here are some highlights from the previous season finale:

  • The show opens with Jack on another plane, clearly in the future. (The Future, Ya’ll!). P.S. The future involves a narcotics addiction.
  • Naomi (the girl who dropped in on the Losties) is “helping” Jack arrange communications, and will notify her freighter their coordinates when they get to the radio tower.
  • Charlie’s getting his ass kicked by two fierce (very unfriendly) lady-friends in the underwater “Looking Glass Station” waiting to fulfill his destiny (of kicking it dead school or scoring the winged groupies of the afterlife)
  • The Losties are ambushing the Others (Juliet was supposed to be a secret agent for the Others and mark the tents of the pregnant gals but she joined the Losties side. And pulled the old double/triple crosseroo.
  • Sayid and Jin (and Bernard) are kidnapped during the ambush.
  • Locke was left for dead. (Oh gosh -Remember when Locke was with Ben, the leader of the Others. And we found out that Ben is only the de facto leader because he’s really taking orders from some other guy that only he can hear. Until Locke came along and he could hear him too. Then Ben realized Locke could give him a run for his money so he “killed” him).
  • Ben warns Jack that Naomi is a bad guy. Not who she says she is. This is confirmed by Penny Widmore. Once Charlie unblocks ‘whatever signals’ in the underwater station, Penny beeps in on the other line. Hurrah. She tells Charlie that she has no boat out to sea and knows no one named Naomi.
  • The Losties (with Ben as their captive) finally make it to the radio tower. De-clog the frequency. And Naomi is radioing her “boat” when she’s stabbed in the back by…John Locke. Ain’t nobody getting off that island while he’s around. (And we know they get off the island so – Draw whatever conclusions you wish).
  • Hurley used the old VW bug to vehicularly manslaughter the captors of Sayid, Jin and Bernard. The four of them, along with Sawyer and Juliet, are coolin’ out on the beach.
  • Losties make contact with whomever is on the boat/freighter and they’ve promised to be there in a jiff.
  • Last scene: FutureJack telling FutureKate that “we have to go back.”

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Oh. 

Oh. They most certainly did.

How many other bands debut to a full crowd (small bar but, probably 75 people) and have a crowd that begs for an encore even after the singer informs them that they don’t know anymore tunes???

“Well, Play ones you already played before!” the crowd demanded.

The Sheeps obliged.

Glory Story was great. Some Honey Pot ladies were rocking in the audience. And there was even The Lone Dancer.

How can you beat that shit?

The only way is to play again real soon.

Jeddler Update – Carousel Lounge calls this AM to let us know that they loved us and we can play again any time we like.  Maybe even a regular gig if we want it.  Who rules?  The Sheeps rule?  And Glory Story, of course.

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I just cannot do it! 1570berriesandcreme.jpg Cherry Chocolate Diet Dr. Pepper.

Cherry Vanilla made a bit of sense, hearkening back to soda fountain days. But I really don’t think soda jerks were pouring a lot of chocolate syrup into cokes. Maybe I’m wrong?

All the advertising makes it look disgusting. The soda can is split open to reveal a giant 6 layer cake of chocolate and cherry goo. Then, quick cut to a hugely robust cherry pie, then a can split in half with a cherry jubilee of grosstastic proportions. Then some sort of cherry swiss cake rolls, a chocolate fountain vomiting an avalanche of cherries. Wheeee! The carbonated soda bubbles are full of cherry iced doughnuts and more pie and cherry frosted cupcakes. Stop the Madness. I want to get off. I already feel sick.

The can has non-enticing cherries which seem to be suffering from some sort of awful Montezuma’s revenge of chocolate.

Although I will give props to this:

 (Play at your own risk. You have been warned).

Slickly produced. Tongue firmly in cheek.

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You know how, like, when you were little and you really desperately wanted a pony? And how it was like probably the only thing in the whole world that would make you really, really, really happy? And, maybe you didn’t even have to own it outright, but you would just feed it and groom it and ride it? Spend some QT together, whispering your pre-adolescent secrets into its nice sturdy and ever-astute ears. And then, twenty years later you realized that right next door to your house was a large stable and paddock with a huge sign that said, “Free ponies for particularly precocious girls who have already mastered the hoppy.”

You just can’t believe it was right under your nose all along.

It’s just the way the world works sometimes, no? I had that feeling upon discovering the trailer for a little movie called “Tuff Turf.” Everything about this movie looks like it was designed for me.

Some thoughts:

  • It’s Tuff. The title tells you straight up.
  • It stars James Spader and Robert Downey, jr (which every single movie made in 1985 should have – they would have killed it in The Color Purple)
  • Formerly preppy Spader is caught up with street gangs…
  • And those street gangs might enjoy a good “dance battle!” 
  • They’ve only got a third rate voice over artist for the trailer – not a good sign.
  • No one in my high school actually wore the head to toe skin tight outfits.
  • No one in my high school actually did gymnastic flip/kicks across the cafeteria ending in a  stage lift.
  • How Tuff can one really be on a ten speed. Not rad.
  • I think it is positioning itself as a ‘Grease’ meets ‘Footloose’ movie.
  • Guarentee: Someone is getting “iced” by movie’s end. (That’s a threat AND a promise).

I’m not sure how I missed it. I’m not sure how it didn’t at least make it on re-runs on basic cable. But I am sure that Mr. Netflix will let me borrow it and it may just make it onto the queue.

What is not to love about this trailer? Don’t lie to me. You starting humming along to the “Tuff Turf” groove by the end, right? Right? And, YES, Spader does “sing” a power ballad in the middle of the movie.

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